The Dawn of the Cursed Queen
by Amber V. Nicole
Published by Rose & Star Publishing
Book 3 of the Gods & Monsters Series
Ask her, boy. Ask her what she begged the stars for and what lives now. Ask her what she ripped from the very heavens. And then ask her if she cares. The old blood runs through her veins.
Nismera and her legions rule the realms as Samkiel’s power fills the sky. With him gone, she strives to solidify her spot on the throne, no matter the cost.
Dianna struggles beneath the weight of half-truths, lies, and deceptions. After overcoming what she thought was her hardest battle, she soon learns she is at risk of losing everything.
Samkiel strives to heal, but he has more on his plate than ever before. The Hand is dismantled, the realms are in turmoil, and the one person he can trust keeps him at arm’s length. Can the two work out their differences, or will they both fall to the blade of the Goddess of War?
The one true king returns, but is it the king or queen who shall rule them all?
Genre
Triggers
Violence, Murder, Death, Sexual Assault, Mind Control
I love this series so much.
But the tension is killing me. KILLING ME.
While at first I wondered why this series was going to be five - or is it six? - books, it's all starting to make sense.
Because while Dianna and Samkiel are the center of the story, all those side characters have been building up to becoming very important to the overall story. Main characters in their own right.
Considering how invested I am in them, they are definitely main characters to me.
There are going to be spoilers below. I'm going to try to keep them as vague as possible, but just consider yourself forewarned.
Dianna and Samkiel
Every time the separated, I would internally scream NOOOOO. Time and time again it is proven that they are better off if they stick together, and yet every. SINGLE. TIME. Amber writes them going their separate ways.
Authors love to torture us.
I loved Dianna and Samkiel in this book. Even when I was frustrated because, once again, they don't communicate with one another, the love between these two is just so beautiful. Spicy, definitely, but also, other worldly.
Vincent and Camilla
Vincent is an interesting character. I knew from the start that there was something off about his character, but I wasn't going to immediately cast him off as a villain. Amber's character's never seem to be good or evil. They all live in the grey zone.
Well. Most of them.
Vincent is one of those characters. Learning his backstory, learning why he has made the decisions he has, made me hurt. I became so invested in his story, and especially his romance with Camilla. I loved seeing Camilla really step into her power in this book, and embrace who she is, and who she aligns herself with.
Cameron and Xavier
Reading Cameron's arc in this book is heartbreaking, and interesting. Heartbreaking, because of what he sacrificed, what he has done, to try to save Xavier. Interesting, because it gives us just a taste of what Dianna went through during her transition. God, my heart hurts for them both.
Isaiah and Imogen
"What's it like? To love?" So we all agree with Isaiah is a golden retriever, right? Like, he follows his orders, does what he is asked to do, but behind closed doors he is loveable. I'm not the only one who is mentally screaming "MATES, MATES!!!! It's because you are mates!" right? He feels a connection to her, and while he doesn't understand it, he follows through on protecting her. He is bothered by her state of mind, and is looking for a way to bring her back. And Imogen, who has every right to want him dead, feels that connection as well. Doesn't understand it. Hates where she is, and what her body is being forced to do, but feels safe with him.
He sleeps on the floor and lets her have the bed, despite her not needing sleep.
I need this to happen. Amber, I won't forgive you if you tear them apart. :(
Kaden ... and my theory
Why do I hope for this guys redemption arc? He is obviously incredibly damaged from the trauma his father inflicted on him and his siblings, and is deep into his sister's kool-aid, but that tiny, tiny part of him that seems to have some humanity ... I have hope. His love for his brother has me hoping he switches sides.
Plus he thinks back to being a child and being scared of monsters. That tugs on my stupid heartstrings.
My theory regarding Kaden is simple. He seems to love/be obsessed with Dianna. We know that will never happen. He has yet to connect with another character that would lead me to think he could move on. I don't think he will ever, truly, be good. I think he will switch sides because his brother does. While Kaden cares for Nismera, he doesn't trust her. His loyalty is to his brother first. In the end, he suspect he will die.
Not for his brother though.
But for Dianna.
Reggie
Love his loyalty to Dianna. While it seems there are moments where he is double crossing, I think Dianna, ironically, is bringing this fate closer and closer to connecting with humanity.
Miska
I love the bond between Reggie and her. It seems like Miska, especially since losing her mom, craves a parental figure, and Reggie, oddly enough, fills that. Her skills with healing will become very important in the future of the series.
Nismera
She is not morally grey. She is just pure evil, which makes her so easy to hate.
All in all, I loved this third installment of the Gods & Monsters series. Amber is killing it. As someone who has read a lot of fantasy, I can tell she has put in so much work in building this universe, and this huge cast of characters. I can honestly say I'm invested in everyone - the exception is Nismera, who can just die already - and I can't WAIT for book 4.
If I must die a fiery death at her hands… I just hope I go with my Xavi.
Tedar: “The World Ender had a lover and not just a fling like in his past. They say she is a beast made of flame and hate, and she followed you lot back. His beast. The female Ig’Morruthen.”
Dianna. He meant Dianna.
Samkiel was a light. He promised peace and change, and I had helped snuff it out. A part of me hoped I burned in Iassulyn for eternity for it. Another part of me knew Dianna would hunt me, hunt us all like she did for her sister. I would be lying if I said I wouldn’t welcome it.
Elianna: “I have reports of an assault on some legion officials making their rounds in the far eastern tip of Tarr. I sent soldiers to see what they could find, and they did not return. But you know who was spotted? Eyewitnesses said a large, dark, scaled Ig’Morruthen flew across the sky before landing. She then proceeded to dismember my loyal soldiers and spread their remains across the field in a warning.”
I swallowed the lump in my throat, along with the hint of amusement and the tiny flame of pride at just what she could still accomplish. Nismera clasped her hands, cocking her head toward Elianna.
Nismera: “What was spelled for me once more?”
Elianna looked as if she wished to be anywhere but here as she folded her hands.
Elianna: “Umm, come get me,”
Elianna cleared her throat, looking around the room,
Elianna: “bitch.”
How ironic was I? The boy who was so afraid of monsters in the dark that I became the very thing I feared.
Love to us was deadly, powerful, and, above all, something we would rip to pieces to keep.
Kaden: “Being around Dianna was the first time I truly felt anything besides anger or hate or bloodlust. For us?”
My eyes held his.
Kaden: “Love is a terrible, cruel thing.”
Dianna: "A fate with a heart. Who would have thought?"
The tension between us seemed to melt away then. Reggie cocked his head with a small smirk. It was such a mortal expression from one so ancient.
Reggie: "Perhaps I have just been in your presence for far too long."
Dianna: "If I'm your role model, you're definitely fucked."
Dianna: "Concerned? Yeah, okay, I've seen the way they look at him. I think their only concern is if they can have a turn."
I looked at Reggie and put my hands on my hips.
Dianna: "It was the one with the ponytail, wasn't it? She's always watching him. I wonder if anyone would notice if I pushed her off the balcony. Wait, can they fly?"
Reggie made a noise of disgust and covered his face.
Reggie: "Dianna."
Dianna: “Don’t worry. I promise not to bite and be on my best behavior. Besides, I’d hate to cause his pretty face to grow a stress wrinkle.”
If he was the sun, by the old gods, she was the moon. Powerful, dark, and overbearing at times. She never left him, nor he her, as if they danced around each other for eternity.
Dianna: “I wasn’t trying to make you mad. I just thought… I don’t know what I thought.”
Samkiel: “I am not mad, perhaps a little taken back at such a ludicrous suggestion, but not mad. That… does nothing for me.”
That sinking, dreadful feeling in my gut suddenly dried up, and another emotion, just as poignant, seeped in.
Dianna: “Wait, really? Nothing? Not a single tickle of excitement? A half swell in your cock?”
Samkiel: “I promise, there is zero swelling.”
Perhaps it was truly a funny thing not to realize how broken or damaged you were until someone came along and picked up every single fractured piece and showed you how just being you was enough.
Dianna: “And then I’ll be back to give you dessert.”
Cedaar’s eyes widened a fraction, and I wondered what the word dessert meant.
Miska: “What’s dessert?”
I asked Reggie. He only shook his head.
Reggie: “Some things are better left unknown.”
Samkiel: “I guess I just don’t want you to see me weak.”
She faked a gasp, placing her hand on her chest before raising it to lay the top of her wrist lazily across her head.
Dianna: “The mighty Samkiel, taken out by a stomachache. You’re right. You’re too weak. I must leave you now for all my other, more powerful suitors.”
Samkiel: “I’m being serious.”
I frowned at her and poked her in the side. She snickered.
Dianna: “As am I. I have several. It was only a matter of time.”
Reggie: “You cannot rule with fear. You will only create more enemies that way. Not allies.”
Dianna: “Who said anything about me wanting to rule?”
I glared at him as he pulled the hood around his head a little tighter.
Dianna: “Besides, a crown on my head all the time? Can you imagine? It would mess up my hair, and I’d have to find outfits to match.”
Dianna: “You think they will have peace with me? You have met me, right?”
Reggie cocked a brow as we passed through a family of tall, multiple-legged beings bickering with each other.
Reggie: “Oh, so you expect him to take another as queen? You are his, correct? Is it not what you both scream relentlessly in the dead of the night?”
My eyes narrowed on him.
Dianna: “Remind me to get soundproof walls when we eventually find him and build a new home.”
Bird: “You would go and save the King of Rashearim?”
My hands dropped to my hips.
Dianna: “Oh, I would level the universe for him, but he told me to be good, so I’ll stick to saving him instead.”
Cameron: “Sorry, but you’re telling me the diabolical Kaden doesn’t trust his equally diabolical evil sister? There’s a joke about karma in there somewhere.”
My brows furrowed as she reached for her pants.
Samkiel: “I can do that,”
I said, touching her hands. She snorted and stepped away.
Dianna: “Wait. I have something for you.”
Samkiel: “I know. I’m trying to get it.”
He grabbed my chin, forcing me to look at him.
Samkiel: “Because I cannot cover your mouth that well on top. We’ve learned that the hard way. And with how I’ve missed you these last few weeks, I am sure you’ll be screaming.”
I lifted a single finger to my lips to shush him, smiling wickedly behind my finger.
Dianna: “Be a good boy and try to be quiet.”
I rose, my belly clenching as he slowly slipped out of me.
Orym: “She’s Ig’Morruthen,”
Orym interjected and stood.
Orym: “You did not mention that.”
Samkiel: “Why would that matter?”
I snapped back.
Samkiel: “She’s good.” D
Dianna crinkled her nose and glanced at me.
Dianna: “I mean, let’s not lie to him.”
Dianna: “You can’t go to Nismera’s prison. If she finds out you’re alive—”
Orym: “She’s not there,”
Orym interrupted.
Orym: “And Samkiel made a promise to me.”
She glared at me.
Dianna: “Of course he did. That damn kindness of yours.”
I recalled the ablaze weapon back into my ring.
Samkiel: “I thought that was one of your favorite things about me?”
Dianna: “It’s becoming my least favorite when you promise detours.”
I spied the small air hole in the top of the caravan and dove, shifting my form to shapeless mist. I slipped through the hole and appeared on the bench next to Orym, one leg crossed and my arm on the back of the seat.
Orym: “Gods above!”
Orym snapped and grabbed his chest.
Orym: “Can you all do that?”
Dianna: “Only the really pretty ones,”
I said, winking at Samkiel. He smiled at me with pride.
Samkiel: “Don’t try to kiss your way out of a discussion.”
My hips moved again.
Dianna: “What if I wiggle?”
Dianna: “I told everyone you two are in love,”
I said, sitting down in a heap. I still wore the look of a short man, my head shaved, and a scar running across my jaw. He was someone I had seen on the streets back on Onuna, and I’d assumed his form to blend in here.
Samkiel: “You did that?”
Samkiel asked, his spoon half raised to his mouth.
Dianna: “Yup,”
I said, taking a bite of what looked like some type of fruit, struggling not to gag in front of him. Solid food was not my friend. I wanted and craved blood, but that was a conversation for another time.
Orym: “Why?”
Orym hissed, his tail flicking.
Dianna: “Two reasons.”
I held up my finger.
Dianna: “One, it gets the guards off all of your backs when you are seen huddled and whispering to each other all the time, and two, for my own selfish one that if now I want to have my way with Samkiel and he happens to moan too loud, they will never think twice.”
Dianna: “Also, I wonder if the tentacles kind of hurt and if he’s into it. In my world, they had these tiny suction cup things.”
Samkiel: “It depends on the species,”
Samkiel said, and then his spoon stilled in his mouth as both Orym and I stared at him. He lowered his spoon, his eyes widening a fraction as he looked at me.
Samkiel: “Not that I would know or remember… ever.”
Dianna: “Well, I think we all make a great team,”
I said, trying to lighten the mood.
I only got two eye rolls, which was significantly better than earlier.
Dianna: "What do you think?”
Vincent: “I think you’re the same raging bitch,”
Vincent spat, his celestial adyin glowing a bright blue.
Dianna: “No.”
I smiled.
Dianna: “I’m worse, actually.”
And then I charged.
Dianna: "You know what I’d like?”
Heat flared within his storm-colored eyes.
Samkiel: “I am already thinking of seven things you are going to say, but please enlighten me.”
I placed my hands on his shoulders.
Dianna: “I want a shower or a bath, whichever they have here.”
Samkiel: “That can be arranged.”
I leaned forward and whispered,
Dianna: “And you can come with me.”
Samkiel: “That cannot be arranged.”
He smirked and gave my ass a couple of pats.
Dianna: “Why?”
Samkiel: “Akrai,”
he practically groaned.
Samkiel: “You are not the quietest, nor are we the most… gentle. Do you wish to cave in an entire tavern full of…”
Samkiel’s words trailed off as I raised my shirt and placed it over his head. He moaned, and the heat of his breath washed over my bare breasts, making my nipples tighten.
Samkiel: “This is cheating.”
I felt his lips brush the sensitive skin between my breasts. I giggled as I pressed his face between my breasts.
Dianna: “I never said I played fair.”
Samkiel: “This is coercion,”
was his muffled response, and I knew I’d won. Samkiel pulled my tank top off and grinned at me before he gripped my thighs and stood, tossing me over his shoulder. I squealed and was sure the whole tavern heard. He chuckled devilishly and swatted my upturned ass as he strode toward the bathroom.
Samkiel: “Quiet, Dianna. Or I will have to put something in your mouth to make you quiet.”
Oh, my man was in a mood, and I loved it.
Reggie: “Because of love. Only her sister reached that celestial part of her, and now he does. He is order. She is chaos. One cannot exist without the other, and if she were to lose that, war would be the least of our problems.”
Orym: “Now that worry line across your forehead can rest,”
Orym said, patting Samkiel’s shoulder. Samkiel rubbed at his head.
Samkiel: “I do not have a worry line.”
I snickered.
Dianna: “I told him of that wrinkle, too.”
Samkiel glared at both of us.
Dianna: “Sami, you were worried about nothing. I feel so overdressed here,”
I said from behind my drink.
Dianna: “I’m glad you are outside. I’ve seen eight areolas, but on the plus side, no one is really looking at me.”
Samkiel: “You can come outside, and I can show you what the dress does for me.”
Dianna: “Unless she wants these small creatures, I don’t see what Nismera could be after.”
Orym: “That small creature you just described spits acid. I think that’s right up her alley.”
Dianna: “Aw,”
I cooed and leaned closer.
Dianna: “But it’s so cute.”
Dianna: “We will not both fit in this bathtub,”
I said, knowing that was exactly what he wanted, and he wasn’t expecting sex. The one thing I’d learned from Samkiel was that he craved to touch me. Every chance he got, he held my hand, pressed a knee to mine, or even a foot. He especially loved bathing or showering with me. Samkiel wanted to do everything with me, and the knowledge healed a fraction of my cold, bruised, damaged heart.
Samkiel: “You know me,”
he tapped my nose,
Samkiel: “I’ll make it fit.”
I couldn’t help the small laugh that burst from me, even though I knew he hadn’t said it on purpose.
Dianna: "I am afraid that you won’t want me anymore. Losing our bond terrifies me because what if that means I’ve lost you? I am selfish and cruel, and gods above, I am evil if I need to be for you. I would do anything for what you gave me, for what you showed me, and even the thought of losing it, losing you, makes me sick with terror. So yeah, I’m sorry I kept it from you, but I couldn’t lose you again!”
Dianna: “No!”
I felt tears prickle my eyes, the darkness swallowing me whole.
Dianna: “Do you know what it feels like to have your soul cleaved in two? To have it ripped from you? That’s what it felt like when you died in my arms. Pure, blinding pain that I don’t think this world or the next has a word for. So don’t stand there scolding me like a fucking child. You are not my father. I killed him to get to you, and I still wasn’t in time. I would burn the world for you, Samkiel, and I would happily hand over my soul so that you may live. I would do it all again if it meant you existed.”
A short man shook his head and tossed a bar towel over his shoulder.
Bartender: “Listen, if you’re here to hit on her, one of my guys just left with his balls on fire.”
Dianna: “Docile, huh?”
I asked, folding my arms.
Samkiel: “They usually are.”
Samkiel rested his hand on my shoulder.
Samkiel: “Sorry about that. I—”
Dianna: “Just go get her before I burn her alive, and we have to do the ceremony ourselves.”
Samkiel: “Yes, akrai.”
Everrine dropped to her knees the second Samkiel released her. Raising her hands above her head, she bowed until her face was in the dirt.
Everrine: “Please forgive me, oh great future queen. I pledge my life to protect you and your kingdom’s secrets. Please spare me from my mistake.”
She continued to ramble on.
Dianna: “What is she doing?”
I glanced at Samkiel.
Dianna: “What did you say to her?”
He shrugged.
Samkiel: “I told her you are my future queen, and I want her to perform the ceremony. I assume she feels bad for touching me, even in gratitude. She is asking for forgiveness. Oh, and she also doesn’t want you to eat her.”
Samkiel: “I want you to make this your new home… I want you to make this our new home. Fill it with laughter and joy like only you can. I want to fight with you here, love with you here, and fill it with our family. Only you can give me this, Dianna. I can give you the house, but only you can make it our home.”
Samkiel: “Do you want to know?”
His voice was husky, deep, and pissed.
Samkiel: “What I would have done?”
I nodded.
Dianna: “Show me.”
Before the words were completely out of my mouth, the crackling heat of his power wrapped around my wrists, forcing my arms wide.
Samkiel: “First, I would make sure you could no longer touch what is mine.”
Samkiel stalked, bearing down on me with that turbulent silver gaze.
Samkiel: “Then I’d ask what you were thinking about that made you do something so wicked by yourself.”
His fingers curved under my chin, and he tilted my head up. His mouth lowered to mine, his tongue sliding across my lips before he claimed my mouth. He growled as I shared the lingering taste of my pleasure, stroking my tongue along his. He broke the kiss and said,
Samkiel: “And you’d say?”
Dianna: “You.”
The word left my lips breathlessly.
Dianna: “Always you.”
Samkiel: “And then I’d get on my knees, lapping at every drenched bit of you, making you come over and over until you couldn’t take it any longer and begged me to stop.”
He pushed my legs further apart before kneeling between them, and my heart skittered.
Samkiel: “And after you thought you couldn’t take anymore, I’d fuck you so hard that the next time you even thought of touching yourself without me, all you’d feel was the aching flesh of where I’d been.”
Dianna: “I hate this,”
Dianna said through our connection.
Dianna: “Why do I have to be a giant flying worm?”
The wind ate my chuckle.
Samkiel: “Technically, you’re not a worm. Ryphors are ancient beasts and much more intelligent than a worm.”
Dianna: “It’s a fucking worm, Sami, and I hate you.”
Samkiel: “Please,”
I said, sending a wave of my desperation to her but also my love.
Samkiel: “Save the others. I can take care of Neverra.”
Dianna: “I don’t even like them.”
Samkiel: “Dianna.”
Cameron: “Maybe send Samkiel in here to feed me.”
Dianna: “It won’t help. You’d still want to feed and fuck him, too.”
A snort left my lips.
Cameron: “Who doesn’t?”
Dianna’s eyes lit up before she tipped her head back and laughed, a full, hearty sound that invited me to join her.
Cameron: “She has an armada, Dianna,”
I called out.
Cameron: “That much I do remember. A fleet large enough to take over every realm, and you’re her first priority.”
Dianna stopped, and darkness built in the room.
Dianna: “She will find, like so many others, that taking me, army or not, is no easy task.”
She looked at me over her shoulder, her eyes burning and blazing red.
Dianna: “I fear no gods and no kings.”
My smile was brief.
Cameron: “I think she knows that, too.”
Isaiah: “So, how does this go? You come quietly, or we take you screaming?”
I squared my shoulders and stepped forward, my words laced with venom.
Dianna: “Oh, baby, you couldn’t make me scream on your best day.”
Dianna: “Your obsession with me is getting a little out of hand, don’t you think?”
I taunted as Kaden tossed a fist at me. I caught it and slammed the bottle I’d picked up off the floor across his face. He stumbled back but recovered quickly. He smiled and ran his hand under his bleeding nose.
Kaden: “Not an obsession. Love.”
Dianna: “I’m in a room with dead bodies, but that comment alone makes me want to barf.”
I grabbed my twisted, broken wrist and reset it.
Dianna: “Wipe the grin from your face. I’ve been fucked harder than you hit. You’ve done nothing.”
Isaiah: “She is a nasty little thing,”
Isaiah said, glancing at Kaden.
Isaiah: “Is that why you are in love with her?”
Kaden: “That, among other reasons,”
Kaden answered.
Samkiel: “I think you’re a fool. Truly. You believe you can beat me here and return to Dianna.”
I raised my hand and willed the gauntlet away to reveal the ring I had made, the one that matched hers.
Samkiel: “Dianna will never choose you, even with all your conniving and fail-proof plans. She chose me and has every day from the moment she laid eyes on me. She left you then and never once looked back. Not. Once.”
Dianna: You are the love of my life, Samkiel. You are it for me, and I don’t always have the pretty words to tell you, but I can show you every single day.”
Another flash of lightning lit up the room, and I swore his eyes shimmered with unshed tears. He smiled softly.
Samkiel: “Every day, huh?”
I nodded.
Samkiel: “Well, that will be a very long time, considering we have eternity.”
My head reared back even as my heart swelled.
Dianna: “Eternity? I don’t know if I agreed to that.”
His lips formed a half smile, and he pointed to my ring.
Samkiel: “You kind of did. Now, not even death will separate us. That’s what was in our vows. You said it.”
Dianna: “I did?”
I joked.
Dianna: “I was distracted. Can we change them? Is it too late?”
I cringed.
Dianna: “I don’t know. Maybe we should rethink everything I just sa—”
He placed a kiss on my forehead and then my cheek. His hand cupped the curve of my jaw, his thumb flicking my bottom lip.
Samkiel: “I have no idea how I’ve survived this long without you.”
Dianna: “Me either.”
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